Seasons

If you are familiar with the Christian vernacular you have heard the phrase, “It’s just a season we are in.” This is a phrase I have heard and used many times before, particularly when it comes to the hardships we’ve experienced the last four years; however, it wasn’t until I was talking to a friend last week that I realized it’s really just been one long season. I’m not sure about you, but I often think of seasons as short bursts of something. Summer only lasts 3 months and then it’s gone. But that’s not necessarily true with the seasons of our life.

It’s no secret that in the last four years we have gone through infertility treatments, miscarriage, illness – both physical and mental, job dissatisfaction, high risk pregnancy, family cancer, death, surgeries, 135 days in the NICU, physical therapy, speech therapy, feeding therapy, vital stim therapy, eye exams, doctors appointments, hours on the phone with insurance, being denied services, fighting to get medical equipment, financial difficulty, unknown after unknown, and I could keep going. One. Long. Season.

Recently, I’ve been reminded of the battle of Jericho that is detailed in Joshua 6. God often does this for me – He presents the same story or verse over and over again because He knows how stubborn I am. In fact, as I am writing this I’m watching Queer Eye on Netflix and there is a choir singing The Battle of Jericho. Ok God, I hear You.

In Joshua 6 the Israelites had finally made it to the promised land after 40 years in the wilderness and then they come upon Jericho. If I were an Israelite, I’d be like, “Really God?! We just went through 40 years in the wilderness, the promised land is in our sight, and you’re giving us another battle to fight?” Jericho was an impossible battle and what does God tell them to do? Walk. Just put one foot in front of the other. Keep going. And that is what He is telling me.

Rachel, I see you in the wilderness.

I am with you.

Walk. Put one foot in front of the other.

I will fight your battles for you.

I don’t always feel this truth, but He is gracious in reminding me, in pulling me back to Him when honestly I’m just angry. Angry at this broken world. And He pulls me close and says, I know. I see you.

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